


Four Anniversaries (Drabbles X 4)

by needleandspoon



Category: U2
Genre: Addiction, Drabble Sequence, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-04-04
Updated: 2007-04-04
Packaged: 2017-10-29 12:28:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/319887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/needleandspoon/pseuds/needleandspoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Giving it up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Four Anniversaries (Drabbles X 4)

I.

The first year is the basic season in hell, complete with the special joys of delirium tremens, insane cravings and a mindless restlessness that makes him wander between rooms, forgetting what he wants by the time he gets there. He doesn't sleep, he sleeps too much. Can't eat, eats too much. Coffee and cigarettes, dope and pills are just bandaids on a shark bite and he's still bleeding. It's the hardest thing he's ever done, but the alternative is pretty much unthinkable, so he sticks with it.

At a distance, Larry's watching him, ready to catch him if he falls.

II.

The second year is better. Most people stop asking him how he's doing. He never tells them the truth anyway. It's like growing up all over again, learning to live without it, but it's not all bad. He's listening to a lot of Miles Davis and thinking he might even understand it, toying with exercise as an addiction that probably won't kill him. There's even the occasional sunrise not seen from the back-end of the night. He's finding it an odd way to live, but it's possible that it's growing on him.

Larry's still around, hovering less and smiling more.

III.

The third year everything changes. Change is a good thing, according to the church of the twelve-step, but it's never been easy for him. Except for this. This he's slid into with an ease that should scare him and doesn't. Somewhere between the first kiss and the first morning, he stopped wondering why. Whatever shreds of the past he's been holding onto are left behind without a backward glance for the love of a man who knows him better than anyone and loves him despite it all.

He's still not entirely sure he deserves it, but he'll take it anyway.

IV.

They spend the entirety of the fourth year in bed, or so it seems. It's not true, but it's the part he remembers best. Not just the way they can make love for hours, but having him, really having him at last. It's having the warm solidity of him by his side, the coiled power of his arms around him, and the way Larry point-blank refuses to let him wallow in the past, no matter where his sleepless late night thoughts go. It's knowing and believing and loving. It's everything he wasn't ready for until now.

And it's all good.


End file.
